TIL the oldest known sculpture is of a naked woman.

Urizen23 · 3 days

Pre Historic Art 101;

There are many theories as the purpose and significance of the Venus of Willendorf and various other similar forms. Many believe it's significance lies in it's sexual connotations. That it was either created as a fertility charm or a celebration of the female form.

One of the more widely accepted schools of thought though theorizes that it's significance was far more than just sexual. The Venus of Willendorf and other similar figures were created by nomadic tribesmen, to which the survival of the tribe and it's continuation were of paramount importance.

Look at the three prominent features of the figure. Firstly she is a large woman. She is well fed, healthy, she has not come from a starving tribe. Notice how defined and deeply carved the pubic area is. She is a fertile woman who will bare many new members of the tribe. Finally her large breast signify that she can feed any children she has, raising them to be strong members of the tribe.

The Venus was a talisman. She represented the highest ideals of the tribe. Survival, prosperity, and propagation.

DoorsUK · 19 days

Here's a minor suggestion. Runes are very expensive. 10k IP for the Rune set I suggested for Ranged AD champs, but they are very important for Early game. You will be able to buy the top tier runes at level 20, You'll have 2 quint slots open and 4-6 Mark, Seal, and Glyph slots open (for 12-18 total, just don't remember the exact number) The AD Quints I suggested will run you 1025 IP, each. You'll want to buy those two Quints and as many Marks as you can right as you hit 20. Seals and Glphs you can fill in as you have the IP to buy them. By the time you're level 20 if you haven't spent all you're IP on buying champs you might be able to fill all of the open slots in your rune book, which is pretty much what you want. The restriction however is that you'll only have one solid rune set. And there are different rune sets for Tanks, AD Champs, AP Champs, Suport and Junglers. You could potentially have one of each of those champs by the time you hit 20 and have no decent runes for any of them. I've been playing like crazy and only have 1 full decent rune set and about half of another. The thing is once you build these runes sets they are usable for many champs of the same type with a little variation here and there. So my suggestion is focus on one type of champ and focus on building that type of rune set. The one I listed before works for AD champs. If you like Ashe it's a good place to start. It's the difference between doing one thing well and doing many things poorly. Though I stress it's what you have fun doing that's more important. Proper runes do give that early advantage, more minions last hits, better lane presence, more champ kills, which all means more gold and better items during matches. You won't be completely crippled without runes but the advantage is noticeable when you've played a bit. But if you just want to try different champ styles go for that if that's what is going to make the game fun for you. The way I personally went was to save to buy as many Tier 3 Runes As I had slots for when I was 20. I built an Ranged AD Rune set and I can use that same set for multiple, yet similar champs. It gave me a very nice boost at 20 and though I wish I could have had a rune set for many different types of champs, AD, AP, Tank and Support etc. I was happy with the one type of champ that I enjoyed, and from there was able to get more wins and earn more IP towards building and buying different champs.

Now for question 2. Don't worry I'll be much shorter with this. If you want to watch vids, streams or competitions go ahead. Streams aren't great for commentary. Watch streams where the streamer is playing a champ you have or want to learn, don't really bother listening to the commentary as it won't be very helpful. But watch how they play the character and how they build them. How they use the characters abilities is far more important than the items that they buy, since the items the buy and when they buy them is meant to counter high level players who play similarly to them. You will not be playing against these type of people for a while. For vids I highly suggest champion spotlights. They will illustrate how the Champ is intended to work and will give you insight on how to play them, build their runes, masteries, and items. As for competitions watch any you want. The commentary can be fun and enlightening. don't worry about what you're not picking, just make sure about to be careful about what you do pick up. It will be high level play strategies. Since you are not in high level play many of them will be useless.

Question three. Solomid guides. Don't worry about them just yet. Try Mobafire.com. They have multiple user submitted and reviewed guides with a little lnk next to the champion name called "The Cheat Sheet". A small printable version of the Skill Order, Item Build, Runes and masteries, no more writing them out. The thing about Mobafire however though is learning how to tell the difference between good guides and bad guides. That will come with learning the game and your Champions. Item builds can be usefull and similar to what you want, but what if, say for instance they tell you to build an expensive item before one that gives you a cheap quicker boost that will help you play better in your lane. Well, don't follow the item build exactly. Learning what the items do and how the help you will take a few weeks but it will be a big help to your game when you find yourself suddenly remembering all the items you normally use and deciding in a game what fits the situation you're in best. Do you need that bit of extra speed right away or a bigger boost of damage a few minutes later. Etc etc.

I haven't found any guides actually that put things simplistically for new players, telling you step by step how you should play, why you should play that way and why it works. Mostly everything will come to you by playing the game and learning from experience. The best thing to do is play, have fun and learn along the way.

DoorsUK · 19 days

ONE IMPORTANT POINT

3 Attack Damage Tier 3 Quints. 9 Attack Damage Tier 3 Marks, 9 Flat Armor Tier 3 Seals, 9 Flat Magic Tier 3 Glyphs. This is a very often used rune set. Especially for ranged Attack Damage Champs. It will cost you a little over 10,000 IP and you will be able to buy them when you reach summoner level 20. 10k IP is quite a lot and hurts when you just start playing. The best advice is to start saving for well before you hit 20. Having a good Rune set is very important for Early game and this particular set you will be able to reuse for many champs later on down the line. Mostly AD Champs like Ashe though, such as Graves, Caitlyn, Vayne, AD Twisted Fate, Teemo, Sivir, Ezreal, Gangplank, Kog'Maw, Tristana, and Twitch. Note This Rune Set is not ideal for all champs I just listed, for some Armor Penetration will be better for them but this Rune Set allows you to at least play them decently with out being held back by the fact that you don't have runes for them.

Back to Teemo. As far as masteries I got the Typical AD Carry 21/0/9. Now you may be saying "I thought you said he was Hybrid". The Hybrid portion comes into play during the Item Build. So lets go through how I play a typical game with Teemo.

I start off with Tier 1 Boots and 3 health pots, no matter what lane I'm in or what kind of champ I'm up against. The extra mobility on him is very useful for harassing and escaping. The first Ability I take is his Q, Blinding Dart. I've gotten a bit bolder as I've played more and I like to go after that first exchange with enemy champs before the minions have appeared. If it works right it gives you a nice advantage right of the bat, and maybe a First Blood, Kill or Assist. I'll go for this nearly every time bottom or top lane. It works especially well if you have a tanky lane partner who goes first and takes the focus. If you both go after the squishier enemy champ it should work well. You have to make sure you laning partner is there with you though.

If I'm mid Ill still attempt part of this. Teemo won't have enough burst to kill the champ out right, but what I do is go about half way to the enemy turret, about the middle distance of the lane though off to the top or bottom side of it, and stay there till I stealth. I then make sure I have a good shot on the enemy than fire Blinding Dart, maybe one auto attack then GTFO. They will miss you with any auto attack and your pop up from stealth will confuse them enough that most of the time they won't even get and ability off on you. The boots help you get out of their range quick, the health pots make up for it if the boots don't do their job. And that's how you start. The next ability to level is your Toxic Shot, this should be maxed by level 9, level it anytime it's up except for when your "R" Ulti is up. You have a situational choice when to put 1 point into Move Quick. If you find yourself getting killed or nearly killed put one in at level three. If you're doing well wait until level 7. Your Toxic Shot is when you'll start doing damage, and it's ability to tick away enemy health even after they are out of range is invaluable. Safely harass the enemy anytime you can with your auto shot, which will apply Toxic Shot. You can use Blinding Dart to open and this will prevent the other champ from auto attacking you, but dont' forget it will not block their abilities, which for many champs is what they use solely, so learn who those champs are and don't expect Blinding Dart to keep you safe from them.

When I first go Back I buy my Tier 2 boots. I mostly go for Mercury Treads these days. The Magic Resist and the CC reduction are very important to Teemo. You Could go Ninja Tabi for armor but you'll be building an item with Armor later on. You could For Beserker's but you'll be building an Attack Speed item right after boots and the MR and CC reduction are worth more. So Buy Merc Treads your first time back, they will cost 850g.

Your second time back start building Malady. Get the book if you're hitting champs more, on of the daggers if you're hitting minions more, or one of each if you can afford them. Malady is the second item you build and the first item to give you a real nice damage boost. Plus it's very cheap. Next you build Madred's Bloodrazor. Buy Madred's Razor's first if you need the armor, Recurve Bow if you need to do more damage. After that what you buy is situational. If I'm getting killed too much I buy Phage and build into Frozen Mallet, which will slow enemies and allow my Malady and Madred's Bloodrazor to do their damage. If you're taking a lot of damage from Ability Power Champs, such as Ryze, Annie, etc I buy Wit's End for the Magic Resist and Atttack Speed. If you're taking everyone down consider a Nashor's Tooth or Infinity Edge instead. Avoid going for a Blood Thirster. The Life Steal it gives it a percentage of damage. Teemo doesn't do a lot of damage per hit, he just damages blindingly fast, so Blood Thirster is useless. I honestly don't usually get to 5th or 6th items with Teemo, if you do figure out where you're lacking or what you want more of and fill in the gap. Maybe some health, maybe some armor, maybe more dmg, maybe a Guardian Angel, it's up to you.

As far as Teemo's Ultimate. His Shrooms act as low range wards, slow enemies that run into them and do damage over time. Shrooms is one of the parts people love most about playing Teemo, and enemies hate about facing Teemo. I can't tell you how many kills and assists I've gotten from my Shrooms. Placed well they can finish off a nearly dead enemy, slow an enemy trying to escape, warn you of an incoming gank, help you escape, keep you "in" the fight earning kills, assists, and gold when you're on the other side of the map or dead. I've even managed to change the tide of a team fight with well placed Shrooms.

Keep playing and you'll learn the high traffic areas of the map, That is where you'll be placing your Shrooms. Bushes are often the best spot for them. When you're in a team fight though don't be afraid to place one or two Shrooms down though before your team or the other has engaged. An enemy champ stepping on one gives your team that few second advantage on them. And that's just about everything on how I play Teemo. There are other play styles but this is working for me now if you want to try it.

I suggest Teemo because above all he's fun, can be deadly when you master him, and by the time you need to worry about buying more serious champs you'll have had fun playing with Teemo along the way, earning your levels and IP.

As far as other champs. I know ranged the best, specifically AD ranged. Graves is my second/third favorite ranged champ. Graves is a lot more tanky than Ashe or Teemo and has a decent escape mechanism and a so-so CC. Caitlyn is also a good champ. She has a good escape mechanism, does great damage, has useful traps, some of the best range distance in the game, and if an enemy champ is low enough her Ulti is an almost guaranteed killer. I haven't had much experience playing Vayne but she is a champ along the same lines.

As far as AP champs, you'll want to look at Ryze, Annie, and Fiddlesticks. For tanky champs try Poppy, Nunu, Alistar (who you can get for free by subscribing to Riot on Youtube) Jax, Warwick, or Garen.

Since you only have 1400 IP you obviously can't buy all of these champs. You need to choose 1 for 1350IP or 2-3 at 450IP. If you want to remain with a ranged type champ my advice would likely still be Teemo. If yo're comfortable expanding to a different type Master Yi for 450IP is a very favored low level champ. Jax, Warwick, and Garen for 1350IP are also decent popular champs. At level 4-5 you get 400 RP from Riot for free. With 400 RP you can buy a 450IP champ, or a 1350 IP when they are on sale. Just one though. I choose to hold on to that 400RP and add it to some RP I bought and got more bang for my buck.

DoorsUK · 19 days

WARNING This will be a wall of text. I'm talking the Great Wall of China wall of text. This is more an in depth playing guide than a respons to your specific questions. I'm explaining with the assumption that you know pretty much nothing about the game, which is where I was after 2 days of playing, and still pretty much am right now, but a whole lot better than I was 6 weeks ago when I started. Plus I've always found explaining in depth from your own perspective can be the most helpful way of helping others understand. The best tip I can give though is to just play, it's the best way to learn.

I tried writing this last night but I feel asleep at my computer.

You're basically describing exactly what I went through went I started playing, which was just a few weeks earlier than you. I was just learning and stuck on Ashe as well.

I liked Ashe because she was the first champ I "got". I was coming from another MMO which was much more stand and bang so adjusting was a bit hard, but Ashe made it easier. She was more like what I was use to, some CC in her slows, good ranged damage and the decent damage and stun of her ulti. I faced the same problem though, I was screwed if anyone picked her first and I wanted to learn more champs.

When I first started playing I was using Annie. Cheap enough to buy fairly decent kit, fun ulti. I was pretty crap with her since I was just learning the game though. Some tips if you buy her (well worth it for 450IP, if not now you'll still probably like her later on down the road when you learn the game a bit more) Some tips for using Annie. Her Q refunds it's mana cost if it kills, either a champ or minion. With Minions this is great, it's a very effective last hitter, won't eat you mana if you use it right plus it makes use of Annie's passive, which after after 4 ability spells makes the next spell stun the target. A second or two to do what you want against an enemy champ in LoL is very valuable. Her shield boosts her defense and movement speed, it's a great talent to defend yourself while harassing in lane and for escaping when you're being damaged.

Before I found Ashe I was also using Tristana. First champ I started doing decently with, but it wasn't great, but that's because I wasn't using her right. Trist is a good champ for you to move onto from Ashe. She's free if you "Like" Riot on Facebook. One thing you'll notice though is no real CC. You get a nice attack speed boost with Draw A Bead, an awesome escape mechanism/gap closer/low health champ killer/wave clearing talent in Rocket Jump. Explosive shot is nice for early lane harass against champs and the passive is great against minion waves. And your ulti is pretty awesome, blow some champs back away from you if they are about to kill you and do some decent damage. Just make sure that you never use it wrong, as in blasting back an enemy champ away from an ally who is killing them.

I finally moved onto Ashe.

Some mistakes I made with her;

I leveled Hawk Shot first for the gold since I was crap at last hitting. I also didn't use the active on the spell, and when I started using the active on the spell I fired it from the champ instead of using the mini map to aim it. I was terribad. Then I learned how to play her a bit. I used her passive when I could to get that first guaranteed crit on a champ right at the begiining of the match when I could and leveled Volley first, but began using Volley as a harass instead of a way to kill minions. I only put one point into Hawk Shot early and learned to get one into Frost Shot early to slow advancing or escaping champs. (I also learned that it's a "Toggle" ability, turn it on when you need it, off when you don't, otherwise it's just eats you mana.) I also learned that her ulti could be aimed with the mini map, which, while it is a poorer method of aiming most times it is the better method sometimes.

I think Tryndamere was the first melee champ I bought, I knew he was an often used OP champ. It did not go well. I just didn't really get melee and wound up dead, a lot. 1350IP blown right there. If you can figure out to use him properly he is supposed to be a great champ.

And this is where I wanted to start really learning the game, how to pick the appropriate runes, masteries, and builds for different champs, and how to use different champs to avoid the problem of Ashe being picked before I could get her.

Now this is a champ that no one else here will suggest. I next bought Teemo. In high ELO he is too easily countered. He's not powerful enough there. Nearly everyone hates the shit out of Teemo. People usually either love him or hate him. He's quite the polarizing champ. People will tell you he's poorly designed, terrible for ranked matches and overall an annoying little sonofabitch. Some people really hate Teemo.

For me Teemo was a great choice though, I had a blast with him. Sure I likely won't be able to use him for ranked matches, but there's a lot of time between starting out and playing ranked games. Again I played him all wrong to start with. I thought he was an AP Champ, I was wrong. Teemo is a true Hybrid champ. When I look at my damage stats at the end of the game it's usually split right down the middle between physical and magic. I might still be playing him wrong and plan on trying different builds but this is working for me now.

This is how I play Teemo; AD (Attack damage) Quints and Marks. I choose those because it makes last hitting minions easier which is very important in the laning phase for Teemo, you need the gold quickly, not as much as some other champs but you do need it faster. Many guides would suggest Armor Penetration Quints and Marks. Armor pen is for killing Champs with your auto attack. Teemo just really isn't powerful enough to really do that early, especially if you wind up solo mid which will happen from time to time. Best scenario for Teemo is top or bot lane with a tanky champ with CC. You only need a few seconds to really take a champ down but ti's a few seconds you rarely get. Either they will run away or attack you, which they have a better chance of surviving. For Seals I run flat Armor, for Glyphs I run Flat Magic resist. There are likely better Seals and Glyphs for Teemo. He's so squishy they make little difference, but I use them for three reasons. I don't have enough IP to buy what might be better runes for him. That little bit of defense works ok for me. Lastly flat Armor Seals and Flat Magic Resist Glyphs will be the biggest bang for your Rune buck. Those two are used for so many champ builds it's funny, you will have continued use for them many champs down the line and will be glad you have them.

Hawkward_Hawk · 23 days

kolinsky · 1 month

Three shots Conquistador Tequila 1 40oz of Hurricane Malt Liquor

Liger86 · 1 month

Hey he said he'd play if we posted.

menevets · 1 month

As long as the space is mine I couldn't care less about waiting.

Liger86 · 1 month

1,2,3,4,5,6

TheDroidUrLookinFor · 2 months

They giggled at your junk for two days. That's what they get. I would give zero fucks about that happening.

pluspluskid · 2 months

I get winded I guess?

DroneMan11 · 2 months

I was taking classes at the Ad agency that did this commercial with one of the guys behind it. Got to see some behind the scenes footage of the havoc these things wreaked. Side note, the frog was apparently a complete accident.

*Edit - Awesome found a Video of it.

Aw_Hell_Naw · 2 months

Well I know who to hire if I'm ever sexually assaulted.

"Your honor I was on Reddit that particular day, can I get a mulligan?"

thralled · 2 months

Much appreciated.

thralled · 2 months

Trying to figure this out myself. Shazam was useless.

bigsol81 · 2 months

D'oh!

You are correct sir

Mistake left so your comment doesn't lose it's relevance.

bigsol81 · 2 months

See also; "Yes Sir, we're you looking for an application?"

quik28 · 2 months

As another heterosexual male Rifftrax is the only reason I could justify watching the Twilight series, repeatedly, while drunk.

Supplemehntal · 2 months

That's a whole lotta roids!

addictedtofluff · 2 months

Unfortunately there's no way to "not mean" these things in some way. If he hadn't thought of them as faults he wouldn't have mentioned them. The thing is these faults are what Dan Savage would call "The Price of Admission". The faults and the flaws of someone you care about that you either ignore, don't care about, or learn to accept. I dated a girl who got a lot bigger during out time together, and while I didn't find her as physically attractive it didn't matter since I cared about her. Would I have preferred her in better shape, yes, was it a deal breaker, never.

The thing that worries me though is him saying "You're not good enough for me" and "please don't leave me alone". That right there says he thinks he can do better, but is afraid to be alone while he looks for something better, so instead he'll stay with you because it's comfortable.

RubberSpandex · 2 months

Needless to say the drain was goatse.

pgizzle · 2 months

Actually it's more about the mix. If I watch a fight it can be a boxing match, which I definitely enjoy, but the next fight will be about wrestling, BJJ, Judo, clinch work, or kickboxing. A fighter with no boxing ability can still take it to a stand up fighter if they can get them down. The mix makes it interesting.

Being "tougher" is certainly apart of it too. I don't question the endurance and toughness it would take to box. Sure the first 9 rounds are missing but the OP titled this "Best Fight Ever" and shows the last round when the guy gets knocked down twice and goes on to win. Last week though I watched Misha Tate refuse to submit until after her arm was bent entirely in the wrong direction, and during and undercard fight some guy take an elbow on the ground ripping open his temple, he went on to win. Those are just last weeks fights. The best fights I've seen range from incredible skill matches to out right vicious brawls and endurance matches.

There's a hundred ways to defeat you opponent in MMA, and a hundred more ways to stop him from defeating you, all ranging from the skilled to the brutal. Personally I find that more interesting than a fight that takes 10 rounds for one guy to decided "I don't feel like getting punched in the face anymore."

pgizzle · 2 months

Sure, I run into a former welterweight champ every now and then. I'll ask him.

pgizzle · 2 months

After getting very into to MMA within the last year boxers look like nothing more than professional pillow fighters to me and I honestly can't understand why anyone watches it anymore.

slaterhearst · 2 months

It's in the middle. Yes second hand smoke can have harmful effects, but the effects it's so often brought up for; heart disease, lung cancer etc. are the results of intense long term exposure. So yes, ban smoking in confined spaces like bars and restaurants for the sake of the staff. Yet why has there never been an option to have a "smoking" bar, even as a specialty? You could sell a smoking license and limit the number of them. This has never been an option though, and this is where it infringes on personal choice.

Bans in places like open parks and beaches moves well beyond the science of keeping one safe from second hand smoke and into the area of legislating personal preference.

ConqueefStador

TROPHY CASE

ConqueefStador

TROPHY CASE

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